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stuff i like: amazon prime

I’ve made peace with the knowledge that Amazon will eventually take over the world, and you should too, because it will make the takeover a lot smoother for Jeff Bezos.  I do a lot of my shopping online, and 9 times out of 10, I can find what I’m looking for on Amazon.  I’ve bought flour on Amazon.  My dryer sheets are from Amazon.  My shoes are often from Amazon, because I guarantee that the shoes you want on Zappos are cheaper on Amazon.  If I’m gifting you, I likely bought your gift on Amazon, unless I am re-gifting.  I’d like to spread my money around, but Amazon just makes it so damn easy.  They pack your stuff in “frustration-free packaging,” vacuum-wrap your books, and deliver everything on time and in one piece.

But the real beauty of Amazon is Amazon Prime.  I think it costs like $80 a year, but what you get is this: free two-day shipping on many (but not all) of the items you’ll be shopping for, including heavy items like this, my new toilet.  Don’t ask me why one toilet is packaged in two boxes.  That is a mystery for my contractor to figure out.  Here’s all I need to know: this sucker cost 40% less than MSRP, nothing to ship, and arrived on my stoop in two days.  Assuming there’s actually a toilet in there when my contractor opens the box(es), that will be approximately my 340th successful shopping experience on Amazon.  How’s that for a track record?

What Amazon knows is that when you have free two-day shipping, you’ll find excuses to do all kinds of stupid shopping on Amazon.  So it is that I once ordered a clip-on webcam for my laptop for $2.40.  It looked like a cheap toy you might pull out of a vending machine with a claw, and worse, did not work, but I don’t hold that against Amazon.  I hold it against the manufacturer, and me, for believing that a webcam that costs less than a Slurpee would be capable of transmitting my image to my brother in Seoul.  Before you start yowling about the environmental impact of shipping such an item, consider that if I hadn’t ordered it from Amazon, I would have driven around to five stores looking for a webcam, so there’s that.  Also, it came in a really tiny box.

But forget all that, because now, there’s Downton Abbey.  I recently started watching the show, two years after everyone else, and discovered that if you have Amazon Prime, you can watch HD episodes of DA through Amazon Prime for free, with no ads.  What?  Yeah, that’s right, Amazon sells streaming video, and if you have Amazon Prime, you can get a lot of it for nothing.  So you can return that DVD of “Just Go With It” that you’ve had molding in your house for the past 8 months–you know, the rental that’s costing you, at $13.99 per month, something like $112.00–and cancel your Netflix subscription.

Hey Amazon!  Take me to your leader.

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31 Comments Post a comment
  1. Donna in Doha #

    I love, love, love DA, Mad Men and Mildred Pierce. Single, working mum in a foreign country and once my little guy goes to bed I’m so there. Amazon Prime is going to be my new best friend because they deliver to Doha via my kinda fake US address! Woohoo!

    June 13, 2012
  2. Matt, handy borther-in-law #

    For whatever it’s worth, one box probably contains the toilet base and bowl; the other probably contains the tank, both of which are surprisingly easy to install if the plumbing in your house is pretty standard (one of the first projects I did in our house last year was to replace the hideous ‘low profile’ one-piece toilets with new two-piece toilets).

    June 7, 2012
    • if you are suggesting that “surprisingly easy to install” means tom can install it, let’s not get ahead of ourselves matt

      June 7, 2012
  3. Y’all know that Amazon bought Zappos, yes? All your money are belong to Bezos.

    June 7, 2012
    • ohmigod, of course amazon bought zappos. world domination

      June 7, 2012
  4. wish we got the streaming with prime in the UK

    June 6, 2012
    • but why? aren’t you all living downton abbey, instead of watching it? perhaps you want to stream jersey shore. 🙂

      June 6, 2012
      • it’s very frustrating, amazon uk recently bought the main netflix competitor here in the UK but their business model is still primarily based around dvd rentals as opposed to streaming although more and more is coming you still need to subscribe seperately. grrrr I’m sure it will all become seamless one day but for now free p&p is all we gat although we get one day not two which is something at least.

        June 7, 2012
  5. Elizabeth #

    Amen times 1,000,000! It’s like a religion for me. And then there’s Downton Abbey. For free. Amazing. Until you pay $15 for Season 2, which you must.

    June 5, 2012
    • it’s like a religion!! love it. and $15 for season two? sold.

      June 6, 2012
  6. Heather #

    I recall almost 2 years ago being advised to register on amazon for eleanors crap…I did not. But I did begin shopping there, and I haven’t quit. And I blame you / thank you for that. As a result of all those purchases, we (ok, i) were given free prime membership, which is set to expire soon. In advance, I blame you / thank you for prime!

    June 5, 2012
    • Heather #

      Also – a toilet? Most impressive amazon purchase of all time.

      June 5, 2012
      • are you saying you reached amazon prime because of me. if so, you can send flowers to my house. also, i agree that the toilet is totally a baller purchase. i may have to write about my most baller purchase: a king size mattress from overstock. but that cost $2.95 to ship so it’s not as baller, nvm

        June 6, 2012
  7. Fia #

    Downton Abbey is good stuff! Can’t wait til they release the third season in Sweden!

    June 5, 2012
    • i wasn’t even aware there IS a third season. i feel panicked at how behind i am

      June 6, 2012
      • Fia #

        Haha! Don’t panic! I would have been happy if I had so many good episodes to look forward to. And don’t miss the extra long Christmas episode after season two. 🙂

        June 6, 2012
  8. Suzanne #

    Interesting. I actively avoid Amazon. It’s always a hassle to return and I’ve never once had free shipping. I am a Zappos devotee (even though I know you pay a premium). I may need to reconsider, but I’m not sold yet.

    June 5, 2012
  9. My family completely rolls their eyes when I start raving about Amazon. They’ve heard it all before. But get this — yesterday I ordered a soap dispenser for my kitchen at 7:30 in the morning. It arrived on my doorstep at 2:30 in the afternoon; the SAME day! How do they do that??

    June 5, 2012
    • you must live near a distribution center!! i am envious.

      June 5, 2012
  10. aballofguiltanddread #

    My family is so sick of hearing about Amazon! They tell me ‘yes we know! You can get it at Amazon!’. I am ready for the takeover now!

    June 5, 2012
    • ungrateful wretches. tom thinks products just appear magically in our house. if we weren’t trolling amazon, they’d have nothing!

      June 5, 2012
      • You are absolutely correct. My daughter is already a savvy shopper and when she needs anything new she always asks if we can check it out on Amazon! I also got my brother hooked!

        June 6, 2012
  11. I had the pleasure of using Amazon Prime for free for a year after making a baby registry (or something) and I miss it. The more they develop their online streaming the closer I get to signing up again.

    June 5, 2012
    • i’ll keep you updated. i know downton abbey streams just fine. i guess breaking bad does too because tom just ordered a bunch of episodes on my account

      June 5, 2012
  12. Mari R #

    I am sold! I’ve been avoiding prime for years but now the DA will sell me on it!!

    June 5, 2012
  13. I too am a solider in the Prime army. Almost 3 years now and consistently one of the best investments I make every year.

    June 5, 2012
    • i love that you remember the date you first met amazon prime. very romantic

      June 5, 2012
  14. You just started watching Downton Abbey? Girl you have so been missing out.

    June 5, 2012
    • i know, i know!!! i feel the panic of obsolescence. if i don’t catch up soon i will be completely left behind

      June 5, 2012

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